Janes-List.com » Military

Networking…it’s easier than you think!

Kelly — Mon, 25 Oct 2010 15:03:01 +0000

Having had a heavy sales background, networking was like second nature to me. Put me in a room full of strangers and, more than likely, I was walking out of there at the end of the night with a pocket full of business cards. Friends would tell me the idea of striking up a conversation with a total stranger was intimidating, but to me, it was a surefire way to make acquaintances-both professionally as well as socially.

After relocating to a new base last February, my hubby deployed two weeks later. I found myself in a new house in a new city not knowing a soul. It was time to take my own advice, otherwise, it was going to be the longest deployment ever. Thankfully, some of the wives whose husbands were deployed with mine were wonderful-inviting me to get-togethers where I met other people-some military, some not. I’ve always thought this was one of the best parts of being married to someone in the military: getting to meet new people all the time. Many times, we end up forming bonds with people we never would have crossed paths or connected with in “civilian” life, and to me, that’s such a great opportunity.

We’ve talked about networking to get the job you want, but it’s just as important socially. The same rules apply and it’s easier than you may think:

Be yourself. Relax. Have a normal conversation with someone new and see what happens. I’ve met people at small barbeques and military functions who quickly became some of my life-long friends, just after discovering we had the same hobbies, interests or political views.

Don’t talk business. If you’re meeting military wives, chances are they are going to ask what you do for a living within the first three minutes of introducing yourself. Tell them, but then change the topic of conversation to what they do for fun, where the last vacationed, books they’re reading or movies they saw, instead. If you’re new to the area, ask about restaurant recommendations. The important thing is to keep the conversation light and easy.

Keep the focus on them. Whether it be their kids, their job or their house, who doesn’t like to gush about the things that are important to them? Get someone new to talk about themselves and not only will they think you’re charming, but it will give you the chance to find some common interests with them.

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Finance Friday: Taking it easy this Christmas

Kelly — Fri, 27 Nov 2009 22:07:35 +0000

If there’s anything good to come of this recession, it’s the opportunity to give my wallet (and sanity) a break this Christmas and get back in touch with the true meaning of the holiday.

For years I’ve fretted over what to get my family members and, of course, my husband (the guy who already has everything), burning gas driving all over town and clocking countless hours on the internet looking for deals. Oh, and let’s not forget the many nights after work spent baking goodies, decorating their packages and distributing to friends and neighbors. This year, I’m done. There is no gift out there that could really show how much I love my family and friends; I’d rather spend the time with them, instead.

With the hubby’s deployment right around the corner, I’ve decided that quality time with him takes priority over running myself ragged for things. With everyone trying to cut back on their spending, there’s no better gift Icould give my loved ones than permission to take it easy and skip the gifts this year.

Of course, I’ll still send cards; in fact, I will most likely lure the pooch to the beach and, much to his dismay, proceed to take one hundred pictures of him with a red scarf tied around his neck. Even though I’m not opting to go crazy this Christmas, don’t get me wrong; there is nothing wrong with giving gifts this year, if that’s what you’ve chosen to do. I’m just saying that, if you’re tight on cash, there isn’t anything wrong with scaling back this year. Your loved ones will still love you, nonetheless.

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Coming soon to Jane’s List…”Good work, sister!”

Kelly — Wed, 16 Sep 2009 00:56:28 +0000

We are about to take Jane’s List to new heights!

Kirsty and I have heard countless stories of military wives across the globe who have worked their way up the corporate ladder despite changing duty stations and living in areas with little to no industry. In honor of these determined, motivated women, this month we are proud to unveil “Good work, sister!”, a monthly post highlighting a working military wife, her professional achievements and story of success!

We will also welcome nominations from you, our readers, for yourself or friends, sisters and moms who have paved their own path of success.

We are excited to share the stories of these incredible women and hope you will find their tales as inspiring as we did!

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Seven things to do before you sell your house.

Kelly — Mon, 14 Sep 2009 11:08:13 +0000

As military families many of us move around quite a bit. Some of my fellow military wives have bought and sold homes with such aplomb they can give professional realtors a real run for their money.

While buying or building a home is one thing, selling your home in a down economy and a poor housing market is quite another. My husband and I can definitely attest to this. We had no say in his change of duty station, as most of you didn’t. And while I’m excited to build our new home and live together again like a “normal” couple, I must admit I’m anxious about selling our current home.

Many homes in our neighborhood have been on the market for more than a year, mostly due to overpricing. While this gives us a bit of an advantage over our competitors (we can offer a lower price and still make a pretty penny) I still wanted our house to be perfect. Thanks to a few tips from my realtor and a lot of elbow grease, I’m confident our home will show well and (knock on wood) sell quickly once we put it on the market. Below are a few steps I took with guidance from my realtor to put our home at the top of buyers’ lists. Happy selling!

1. Clean from top to bottom. Before you considering selling your house, give your home a good cleaning. Wipe down cabinets, clean windows, sills, ceiling fans, shelves, baseboards and mouldings, your oven and the inside of your microwave; vacuum furniture, rugs and draperies, scrub baths and eliminate pet hair. You wouldn’t welcome family and friends to a dirty home and you definitely shouldn’t welcome potential buyers that way, either.

2. De-clutter. This is just as important as showing a clean house. Go through piles on counters, tables and desks; shred what you don’t need and file important documents out of buyer’s sight. Recycle old newspapers and magazines and organize shelves, closets and cabinets. Buyers will open closet doors so don’t try to stow it all in there.

3. Put away toys. Walking into a home where toys are strewn about or stacked in corners is a total turnoff for buyers. Narrow your child’s stash to a few favorites and store the rest. The same goes for pet toys. I bought a small basket for my lab’s toys which I plan to put in the closet during showings.

4. Double-check your carpeting. There are plenty of inexpensive alternatives to replacing your carpeting. We had ours stretched to get rid of rolls and then rented a steam cleaner from Ace Hardware to shampoo it, saving us thousands of dollars. If you have tough, dark stains, holes or ripping, you may, in fact have to replace, but make sure you check all other options first.

5. Paint. It’s amazing what a coat of paint can do. It gives new life to shutters, front doors, baseboards, shoe moulding and spackled spots. If you’re going to paint a room be sure to use a neutral color.

6. Add some curb appeal. The front of your house is the first thing buyers see so be sure to make a good first impression. Trim hedges, mulch flower beds, paint shutters, clean patio furniture and add some color with potted plants or flowers. You only get one chance to make a good first impression, so do it right.

7. Put away personal items. The verdict is still out on this one. Some realtors say it’s hard for buyers to imagine themselves in your home if your pictures are all over, while others believe it helps make the home feel more complete. I put most of my pictures away just to be safe but use your judgment.

Always be thinking of what potential buyers would think. Sure, you can’t control whether or not they’ll like your decor or paint colors, but those are easy for buyers to change. Put your house on display and buyers will want to make an offer!

Photo by thinkpanama

Top military wives on Twitter

Kirsty — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 12:01:59 +0000

If you’re already on Twitter, you know how much we love it. But we had a hard time in the beginning trying to find the top military wives to follow on Twitter. So we decided to conduct a digital public service and plug 50 of our favorite military wife follows on Twitter. If we didn’t list you, it may be because you protect your updates, or we couldn’t easily verify that you are a military spouse. If we left you off the list, plug yourself in our comments section, so people can find you! Enjoy!

@afwife08 – Cristy is a true blue twitter follow based in Illinois
@Arielanna – This Illinois-based Army wife and a special education teacher.
@armywife1025 – Jessica is an Army wife in Wisconsin enduring her first deployment.
@ArmyWifeyDebbie – A very funny follow, Debbie is also a mom and Army volunteer.
@astonesthrow – Jessica is one popular Marine wife tweet based in San Diego.
@AundrayC – This image consultant and army wife is a great follow for her positivity and inspirational quotes.
@bunnypoo4u – This Texas Navy wife is a terrific Twitter conversationalist.
@cirifenzel – Military wife, fitness buff and marketing expert in D.C.
@deltawhiskey1 – Air Force Wife and enthusiastic tweet with a great lifestyle blog featuring lots of yummy recipes.
@elleToom – Laryssa is the impressive wife to a retired Army officer, triathlete, speaker, writer and homeschooling mom of three.
@freakinserious – The budding photographer is also an Army wife and mom in Oregon.
@GeekGirl611 – USMC wife in Florida and active Tweeter.
@greeneyedkat – Kat is an Army wife in North Carolina.
@JanesList – Yes, we have to throw in a plug for ourselves! Follow us to get the career, relationship and deployment advice that you find on our blog.
@JavaCupcake – Warning! Following may cause weight gain! This Washington-state Army wife is a cupcake extraordinaire!
@Jdavis55 – Army wife, speaker and author, Judy helps her tweets learn to be successful.
@JenTheArmyWife – Based at Fort Drum, Jen is quite the Twitter socialite.
@kdpartak – A California-based Army wife and entrepreneur.
@kellystivers – USMC wife and co-founder of @JanesList. Need I say more?
@kissmygumbo – Greta lives in the home of gumbo – Louisiana with her husband who’s retired from the military.
@kneedeep – This former Army wife is a mom, blogger and active military tweet.
@kpiper - Co-Founder of @JanesList and prolific tweeter on pop culture, PR and plenty more.
@MailourMilitary – Trish is a military spouse and tireless volunteer for our troops.
@MeganL739 – She’s not a military wife yet, but we know she’s devoted because she has a website just for army girlfriends.
@MilAve_Deborah - Deborah is based in Michigan, an Air Force spouse and runs MilitaryAvenue.com.
@MilAve_Leanne – MilitaryAvenue.com Director Leanne is an Army wife, and busy mom of three.
@MKell_USMCwife – Malia is a Corps wife living in Hawaii and running a cool photography blog.
@MotoWife – Marine wife, editor and writer living in San Diego.
@MrsKimChapman - Another Marine Corps wife and blogger living in North Carolina.
@MyArmyLife - This Texas-based Army wife is a mom and a new blogger to boot.
@MyArmyWifeLife - Great blogger and tweeter on all the aspects of army wife life.
@NeoConBlonde – Marine wife, mom and attorney who’s not scared to share a strong opinion!
@NestandInvest – Stephanie is a teacher, blogger and active Tweet living in North Carolina and married to a USMC pilot.
@PandorasFoxx – Molly is a Marine wife and journalist. Follow her for the inside on what’s happening around Camp Lejeune.
@pjnomaha – PJ is a military wife, writer and photographer in Omaha.
@sara0120 – I’m partial to Sara because she’s not only an Army Wife, but also a Yorkie mom!
@sarahorn – Based in Nashville, Sara shares her thoughts on faith, marriage and military wife on Twitter and her website.
@sbelltransplant – Marine wife and fun-loving mom of 3. Follow for lots of smiles!
@SEAL_Strong – Suzanne is the wife of a former Navy SEAL living in Tampa.
@slhoppin – Based in Washington D.C., Sue is a military spouse and military family advocate.
@starryskye81 – This Navy wife and mom is based in Virginia Beach, not to mention a hilariously snarky tweet.
@TammyMunson – Tammy is an Army wife with a conservative streak and popular blog.
@Tsoniki – This military wife and Washington state-based mom is a must-follow for craft lovers.
@thearmywife – Jessica runs a fun blog with great product reviews and giveaways.
@TheSavvySpouse – This SoCal Tweeter and blogger helps military wives become entrepreneurs.
@tiffsilverberg – Tiff is the quintessential Navy wife, along with a freelance writer.
@usmcwife8999 – This North Carolina Marine wife is always there to lend you a supportive tweet.
@usmcwives – Based in Minneapolis, this tweet runs a great online community for bringing wives together.
@VTarmywife - Kelly is an Army wife of 16 years, celebrating their final year of active duty in Vermont.
@WendyJDay – This Michigan Army wife and mom is a great follow for a conservative viewpoint.

Photo by: Bakerella

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Ten ways to celebrate July 4th and help our troops

Kirsty — Sat, 04 Jul 2009 16:04:35 +0000

Twice in the last two weeks, I’ve gone out to dinner with my husband and have been approached by a very kind man or woman who thanked my husband for his service (the haircut always gives it away) and offered to buy our meal. These encounters always overwhelm us. Mainly because we’re pretty fortunate and know that while their generosity is heartwarming, there are other ways for $50 make a much larger difference. On this July 4th I think about all our service members and their families who sacrifice so much for our country. But, I also think about the people who give selflessly to support our community 365 days out of the year. I want to thank them for their service. On that note, here are ten great ways to get involved and support our military year round.

We’ve written before about the great services the USO provide. But, they can’t do it alone. This summer they’ve teamed up with Sweethearts candies with the goal of shipping two million care packages this year. For every $25 you donate, they can ship a care package valued at $75, which includes the brand new Red, White and Blue Sweetheart candies.
Operation Open Arms is an initiative launched in Southwest Florida to give U.S. service men and women on leave free or discounted benefits to enjoy brief R&R before returning to a foreign duty station. The grassroots program relies on corporate sponsors throughout Florida like theme parks, restaurants, hotels, fishing charters, golf courses and much more to distribute these benefits. They also have some great ways you can contribute, listed on their website.
The Wounded Warrior Project raises awareness for and assists men and women in our armed forces that have been severely injured in combat. Consider donating $99 for a Wounded Warrior Project Backpack – a transitional care pack sent directly to Iraq and Afghanistan to provide comfort for service members in military trauma centers. The backpacks are filled with toiletries and personal items to make their hospital stay more comfortable and your donation even includes the opportunity to write a message of thanks for your warrior’s service.
This cause is especially close to my heart. Carolina Canines for Service, which trains and provides service dogs for people with disabilities launched a program in 2008 to train service dogs in Camp Lejeune’s brig to for wounded warriors. The program is a “triple win” for the dog, which is a rescue, the prisoner who gets a second chance to help a comrade and the wounded service member who gets a “new leash on life.” Visit their website to learn more and donate.
Blue Star Families is a new friend of Janes-List.com and serves an important role as the bridge between military families and the policymakers who affect military life. The non-profit was formed by military spouses in December 2008 and offers lots of great ways to be involved if you are military family.
eMail Our Military was created in 2001 when the Department of Defense canceled the “Any Service Member” and “Operation Dear Abby” mail programs. Service members can register to receive mail and are matched with civilians who sign up to show their support. This is an excellent way to get involved and won’t cost you a dime, just time and a big heart.
The Military Child Education Coalition levels the educational playing field for military children around the world. Military children will move six to nine times during the K-12 school years, which means inconsistent academic standards, access to programs and much more. These unique challenges, combined with the stress of a parent’s deployment can be a source of trauma for a child. Help by making a donation or volunteering to build awareness in your own school district.
I’m of the belief that there is a mental health crisis among our service members, pushed to the brink fighting in two simultaneous wars for more than five years. In 2007 the Defense Centers of Excellence for Psychological Health and Traumatic Brain Injury (DCoE) launched the Real Warriors Campaign to combat the stigma associated with psychological health care and treatment. It staffs a 24/7 call center (866-966-1020) that provides confidential support to active duty service members, veterans and their families. Partner in their mission by visiting their website.
Operation Homefront is a nonprofit that provides help to military families struggling with emergencies when a service member is deployed, or when a wounded warrior returns home. Its network is comprised of more than 4,500 volunteers in 30 nationwide chapters. Visit their website to donate money, household items or volunteer your time.
American Heroes Return is a non-profit military transition program that helps troops returning from combat assimilate back into civilian life by providing a supportive living environment and offering out-of-the box solutions to post traumatic stress disorder. That out-of-the-box solution centers on a rural setting conducive to personal development and healing. Visit their website to make a donation or volunteer.

Photo by: Randy Son of Robert

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Finance Friday: Max out your food budget!

Kelly — Fri, 03 Jul 2009 19:11:53 +0000

With the recession in full-swing, getting the most bang for your buck is more important than ever, especially when it comes to groceries. Supermarkets are stocked with inexpensive foods laden with sodium and tons of preservatives, but you don’t have to choose these items, sacrificing flavor, freshness or the health of your family in order to save money on your grocery bill.

Head to the commissary. Ours is a 45-minute hike from our house, but what I spend in gas I more than make up for in savings on my grocery bill. A gallon of milk is $1.50 cheaper than my local supermarket, there is always a sidewalk sale on staples like canned soup and veggies and 9-packs of boneless, skinless chicken breasts run for about $8. Remember to bring along your military ID and avoid shopping on paydays, as those are the most crowded times to shop.

Eat less meat. This may be a tough task if your husband was raised on meat and potatoes, as mine was, however, meat most often accounts for the bulk of grocery bills. A few times a week, try making meals that are based on pantry staples like whole grain rice, beans, eggs and legumes; they are inexpensive, filling and rich in protein. Or, if you definitely can’t give up red meat, chicken or fish, make it a side portion instead of the center of the meal.

Work out a meal plan ahead of time. Once a week plan all the meals for the following seven days and shop only for those items you’ll need to prepare them. You’ll have leftovers to take to work for lunch, cut down on the amount of food you buy, and, in turn, how much food you end up throwing away because you didn’t use it.

Take advantage of in-season produce. Buying produce in season is fresher and less expensive due to high supply. In summer, look for cucumbers, tomatos, squash, zucchini, red, yellow and green bell peppers, ears of corn and peaches. Produce that is out-of-season is expensive and tasteless because it is force grown, so look for produce stands that grow locally.

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Five steps for an A+ deployment

Kirsty — Tue, 30 Jun 2009 11:19:11 +0000

After I experienced my first deployment, I asked my husband to rate how I coped on a scale of 1 to 10. I was pleasantly surprised when he gave me a 9.5 and told me he thought I was exceptionally level headed and supportive for my first time going through it. I recently asked him what it would it take to be an A+ spouse during a deployment so I could share it here, straight from the Marine’s mouth!

1. Cookies

This was the first thing he said to me. It surprised me because I mistakenly thought homemade cookies would go stale on their journey halfway around the world. The best he got from me was probably 100-calorie graham cracker packs! Well, it turns out you can pack cookies to keep them fresh and apparently nothing tastes as good as real butter, genuine sugar and lots of love you bake into them.

2. Care packages

On that note, take note that you should keep the care packages coming! This was something that I was particularly good at. And I didn’t have to spend a lot of money or time to do it either. Personally, it felt great – like I had a real connection to my husband – every time I packed a new box and waited in line at the post office to send it. And apparently the feeling is mutual, because I hear that nothing beats hearing your name called at mail call. And if you have “care package idea block,” we’re here to help. Check out our 101 care package ideas series here.

3. Communicate consistently

Be consistent when communicating, he advised. If you know that your husband typically calls at a certain time during the week, make your best effort to not deviate from that schedule. Or, if you email everyday, try not to suddenly fall off the radar if you get busy, or go out of town. It’s tremendously frustrating when they are looking forward to talking to you and you can’t be available.

4. Be judicious in sharing your problems

I’m not saying to sugarcoat things, or bottle up your problems, but be judicious in sharing your problems with your husband when he’s deployed. It’s nothing but aggravating when they love you and want to help but cannot do anything. It’s fine to ask their advice if you think it will help you solve an issue. But, if you end up solving an issue without his help, it’s probably best that you don’t mention you ever had a problem in the first place.

5. Know when to hold ‘em, know when to fold ‘em

I think going through a deployment can actually help to learn to communicate more effectively as a couple. Every time you talk to him is precious and you don’t want to waste that time bickering. During a deployment, it’s easy for you to feel cheated and easy for him to feel resentful, but it’s your job to keep your emotions in check and to not waste those precious minutes you get to talk or email fighting.

Photo by: ldoherty81

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Finance Friday: Protect yourself from identity fraud

Kelly — Sat, 27 Jun 2009 02:19:57 +0000

During my career in finance I saw my share of credit reports ruined by identity fraud. Credit cards opened fraudulently in my clients names, charged to the max and then sent to collection due to non payment; auto loans taken out for vehicles that my clients never bought and, in one case, an individual who had declared bankruptcy in my client’s name to avoid paying illegally incurred debts.

Victims of identity theft can spend years and thousands of dollars restoring their credit record. Victims can lose job opportunities, be refused loans and even get arrested for crimes they did not commit. Skilled identity thieves can gain access to your info, including:

Stealing your mail
Digging through your garbage
Skimming information from ATMs
Obtaining information directly from you, posing as legitimate companies

Place an active duty alert on your credit. Military personnel are, unfortunately, a target for identity theft because of the amount of time spent overseas. If your husband is deployed, you can place an active duty alert on his credit reports to minimize the risk of identity theft. The alert lasts for one year and removes you from the credit reporting companies’ marketing lists for credit card offers for two years.

Invest in a shredder. This is one of the best ways to thwart identity theft. Shred every piece of mail that has your name and address on it including receipts, copies of credit applications, insurance forms, doctor’s statements, bills, checks, bank statements, expired credit cards and any credit offers you get in the mail. Thieves can open accounts in your name through these applications.

Place passwords on all accounts. This includes credit cards, bank accounts, utilities and phone accounts.

Keep info in a secure place. A safe is a great option to secure important documents like social security cards, birth certificates, passports, marriage certificates and anything with your birth date and social security number. This is especially important if you employ a maid or nanny or are having work done on your home.

Inquire about security procedures. Any institution that collects your personal identification-doctor’s office, your workplace, attorney, accountant-should store and dispose of personal information accordingly.

Treat your mail carefully. Drop your mail in post office boxes instead of leaving in your mailbox to be picked up. If you’re going on vacation, call the post office to place a hold on your mail at 1-800-275-8777.

To contact the three consumer credit reporting below with any additional questions.

Equifax 800-525-6285 www.Equifax.com

Experian 888-EXPERIAN www.Experian.com

TransUnion 800-680-7289 www.TransUnion.com

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Finance Friday: Buying a home, part 2: Working with a realtor

Kelly — Sat, 20 Jun 2009 01:34:56 +0000

You’ve obtained an approval from your mortgage broker and determined the purchase price of the home you can afford, so what is your next step? Working with a realtor who will help you find the home of your dreams (or the home you’ll live in until the next duty station.)

Select a realtor. Experience is most important-you wouldn’t trust the care of your children to an inexperienced nanny, so why put the biggest purchase you will ever make in the hands of someone who hasn’t gone through it before?

Just like when selecting a mortgage broker, ask your friends, family and colleagues-anyone who owns their own home-which realtors helped them, what their buying experience was like and if they would recommend him or her to you. Are they available after hours, if that’s when you are able to talk? Do they return phone calls promptly? Are they knowledgable about the area you’re interested in? These attributes will all be extremely important as you move further along in the home buying process.

Do your homework. Once you’ve been pre-approved, go online to view homes that are selling for that price. Be sure to look at square footage typical for that price range, as well as amenities, lot size and number of bedrooms. Sites like www.Realtor.com are an excellent way to compare homes in your price range and will give you an understanding of what is available in the area in which you want to buy.

Preview homes. This is the best part of buying a home-finding the one that is perfect for you and your family. Make a list of all the amenities that you would like to be included in your home, but be aware that it isn’t realistic to obtain everything on your list.

Make an offer. Once you find a home your realtor will submit an offer to the seller’s listing agent. That offer will either be accepted, rejected or countered. More often that not, the sellers will counter your offer with a price higher than yours, but less than the purchase price. This is when a realtor will act as a liasion between you and the sellers, going back and forth, negotiating. For example, a seller may counter your offer with a higher price but offer to pay $5,000 in closing costs.

Sign contract. Once your offer is accepted, both the listing agent and your realtor will draw a purchase contract that meets both party’s approval. In addition, you will be required to make a deposit with the contract to secure the deal in good faith. This money is referred to as “earnest money” and will be held in escrow until the loan closes. Earnest money is deducted from your total closing costs.

Secure financing. At this point, your mortgage broker will order an appraisal to ensure the property is worth the price you’ve agreed to pay and send your loan to the bank for final approval. While the mortgage broker is securing financing, your realtor will order a home inspection, keep in touch with the mortgage broker and set a time and date for closing.

Closing. Once your mortgage broker has obtained final approval from the bank, loan documents will be sent to the closing attorney for you to sign and you will officially be a homeowner!

Best of luck on your search for your home! There is nothing more gratifying that owning your own property.

Janes-List.com » Military

Networking…it’s easier than you think!

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Finance Friday: Taking it easy this Christmas

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Coming soon to Jane’s List…”Good work, sister!”

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Seven things to do before you sell your house.

Most Commented Posts

Top military wives on Twitter

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Ten ways to celebrate July 4th and help our troops

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Finance Friday: Max out your food budget!

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Five steps for an A+ deployment

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Finance Friday: Protect yourself from identity fraud

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Finance Friday: Buying a home, part 2: Working with a realtor

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